They are baaaaacccckkkk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My stalker 🙂
and my ex… *gasp*
Okay so, let me start from the top. My ex… yes, yes, the one i was pining about months before is back in my life…
No, we are not dating or sexing. We talk… we talk a lot… a whole lot… hmmm
We did stop all forms of communication after i found out that he was dating behind my back (so to speak) and didn’t tell me about. I huffed, and puffed and cut him off. Then…well, i proceeded to pine and pine some more until i couldn’t take it anymore and stopped, i was done. Fast forward a couple of months later, he decides to send me a text out of the blue.
Of course my heart was beating 120beats per second then it stopped and dashed to my mouth when i saw his number flash on my phone (had deleted him- i was moving on you know). I actually broke out in a cold sweat. Typical chic i am. Ha!
I did text him back and one thing let to another badaboom, badabing, we are chatting it up like old pals.
He did tell me that him and ol girl were kaput. I was secretly happy- i know, how evil of me. But how many of y’all haven’t done a happy jig when the next relationship your ex has doesn’t work out?! Don’t be shy now, raise that hand up high and wave it!!!
He does have an agenda though- wants another chance to love me.
Ummm, yeah… I am not to sure about that.
Right now, i’m staying guarded and just letting the men duke it out. I don’t want to open myself up to the wrong person and get hurt all over again, even if it’s an ex.
He came to visit me a few weeks ago and i was in a panic before i said “yes”.
He had never come to visit me while we were in the relationship. I had a roommate then and we had a “no men allowed” policy, ever since one of my roomies men rolled up to the crib unannounced and found me in a bath towel!!! I finally got my own place so now, i finally have the privacy i have always craved.
We had fun though- we went out and he met my legendary friends. Yes i know you are wondering… did i give it up?
We made out though. Boyyyyy let me tell you that i was missing being touched BIG time. What?!! I felt alive. LOL!! I could feel the weakness creeping up on me and wanting me to just say, “Fuck it, sex me real good!”
Too bad common sense was gnawing at me like a bad rash all thru the steamy sessions we had.
-A part of me does want him back. I guess because i’m used to him. You know like those old sweats that you have. They are comfy and you know how they feel and move on your body.
-Another part of me wants something more that’s currently out there.
Sometimes i do wonder if i made a mistake getting back in communication with him. A few of my friends think so. “Let sleeping dogs lie…” “what’s in the past should stay in the past…” “he’s an ex for a reason…”
I don’t know people. I don’t know.
Oh yeah and then there’s the return of the stalker. *insert eye-roll* He is not even worth to be in the stalker hall-of–fame section no more- so over him and his antics. We hanged a few months back and we did end up kissing.
I did let him know upfront that i was feeling him. Clearly that is not what he wanted to hear. Probably wanted to hear something in the lines of , “hey, why don’t we just have casual sex in the meantime while we deicide if we really wanna be together.” PFFT!!! Not with me he won’t. I don’t do casual sex.
All or nothing has always been my motto.
After a few calls and texts later, i did extend an invitation to him. He responded back… a friggin’ day later with a lame excuse to boot!!! I have never cursed a man like i did him that day!!! That did it for me. I was done with him. Did my pontius pilate routine and kept it moving.
After months of silence between us, he send me a text last week. Asking why i’ve been so quiet bla bla bla… Bunch of small talk later, he wants to see me. I swear the nerve of this negro!!!!
I haven’t said yes… or no, just a we’ll see.
In other news, it’s birthday week for me. Y’all know what that means: drinks, drinks and more drinks… (hic)
The ex did send me very pretty flowers. Look at him trying to wiggle his way back into my heart. I teared up when i received them… damn him!!! *shakes fist*
Aren’t they pretty?!!!